Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Garden of Sinners

Drip.

Was that a teardrop?

"Hm... it's starting to rain..."

Bright clear skies. Sunlight.

Silence.

Yet amidst the deafening silence, screams could be heard.

Screams which could be felt by the heart.

"Heh... so will... you... be coming together... with... me ...?"

"...No... I'll stay...i don't belong in paradise..."

"......."

He had his last words.

She got up, taking the bloody knife out of the limp body who was once an angel to her.

And so, she slowly walked...

back into the Garden of Sinners...










Ok... just a lame attempt at a mini story/scenario...haha... was just in the mood to write something but dunno what to write about.

Saturday, January 26, 2008

1 month~

Happy one month anniversary dear !

haha... what a coincidence (fate? :P) that we both wore yellow today... hope that you really liked the presents ~

and i just wanna say that...

i may not be the most romantic person on earth...

i may not be so good at expressing my feelings...

i may not be good with my words nor very tactful...

but trust me.

i'll stand by you.

i want to be there for you.. through the good times and the bad times...

and i'll do whatever i can to make you happy :D

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Family and peace

Haven't been in touch with the inner and creative side of me quite recently... lack of time... studies, projects, assignments >.<"

Gonna start by talking about some of my inner thoughts going through my head... and my reminiscing about the past... and the lessons learnt...

Going to talk about my past a bit...

I used to be very rebelious in the past. It started ... i guess when i was in secondary school. I used to argue with my family members for the sake of arguing, for the so-called "Finding my self-identity" stage... It may have seemed to the rest that, i was a kid beyond hope, that i had no conscience. But honestly... back then... i did hurt deep down inside. I hoped for someone to... sort of forgive me and embrace me. But it never did happen. It only served to deepen my hatred and anger.

But someone woke me up. With his tears. The 2nd time i saw him cry. The only other time i've seen him cry was because... my grandfather passed away. Yup... this person is my father. He made me realise how selfish i was. That i only thought about my own feelings, not caring and even thinking about others.

It dawned upon me... that it was so true... how i tried to make myself the centre of the world, egocentric if you'ld call it. How i'ld make myself seem to be the victim of everything, even if i wasn't the victim.

It really brought out the true feelings out of me... that i actually hated myself rather than hated others. I couldn't stand the sight of myself... this pathetic me who was still trying to escape reality. this pathetic me who had hurt so many people. I was just overwhelmed with this self-hatred back then.

But my parents sought to stand beside me. And i am really thankful to them. Even though i had done so many wrongs to them. Even though i had time and time again hurt their feelings, lied to them, and said... words that i shouldnt have said. It just made me realise... no one had given up on me from the start. I was the one who had given up on myself. I was the one who blinded myself.

I am really thankful to my parents now. The burden placed upon my heart during those days was just lifted. I found a new peace inside my heart. Almost like i was reborn.

Peace... in this sense... started to come into my life. The arguments and everything else stopped. I started opening up to my parents, though not about everything. Tension and animosity disappeared...

Life's journey is filled with bumps and rocks. It may be a long ardous journey... but no matter what... we'll all reach our destination in the end... and looking back... we can laugh at all the hardship and happy times that we've gone through...

Eventually... what really matters... is that everybody is happy... and in order for that to happen... it must start with ourself...

Change our own hearts. Change other's hearts. Make the world a happy place.

Haha.. sounds lame... but that's a nice dream to have... :D :D :D



Now having finished talking about my family... i guess i'll talk about my concerns recently... and about my mentality towards some stuff.

Now... i'm not the person who likes to see conflicts. i hate to see people suffering. I hate to see people in pain. I really want to help these people. i want to do something. But... i'm powerless in reality. i can't do anything much to change the situation or help the people involved. i understand that... i'm not god. but this feeling just really sucks. seeing your close ones unhappy... also makes you feel down. just like a ripple effect on the water. i know some people will say that i shouldn't place this burden of theirs upon myself... but i just can't help it. words are all that i can offer at the moment...but if i could... i just want to let them know that i'll always be there for them...

Sunday, January 20, 2008

Jay Chou Concert !

weeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

tired.... got back from jay chou's concert...

went there together with dear, xiu ting and xiu ting's frd ( paiseh i forgot the name! >.<")

went to bugis to find them... originally supposed to be at 4pm... but i ended up leaving the house earlier than usual as my family ate outside.. so left directly from there...so i met them at around 3:15 instead... haha... just when the arcade basketball competition at Virtualand bugis was about to begin...and despite not winning... i think they all did really well! ( well... at least much better than me >.<" )

haha... played drums for a while while waiting for xiu ting's frd to arrive... somehow after not playing for years... i managed to reach levels higher than compared to last time when i played it relatively more often... haha... strange huh... and thanks to dear who kept increasing the difficulty for me... pushing me higher... haha...but you're just so much better than me at co-ordination ... lol~

after that we ate at siam kitchen ... which er.. honestly wasn't that fantastic... the food turned out... different from what we expected... and one dish even had a slight smokey taste... slightly similar to what u smell from cigarettes... >.<"

after that we made our way to the national indoor stadium... got to kallang mrt... but couldnt decide on finding the correct bus... or walking there... so we resorted to taxi.. haha..4 people so ok la... but the taxi driver was this old man who couldn't keep to his lane and almost banged other cars .. like 3 or 4 times? even after the cars honked him... he still seemed ignorant of it >.<" scary times >.<"

but oh well... got there eventually in one piece... and saw loads of people queuing up to buy the jay chou merchandise.. eventually they opened up a 2nd stall.. which was to open at the north entrance at 7pm... but still had a long queue... which moved extremely slowly >.<". and to top it off... we found out... they don't sell the stuff directly there! it was more of a stall where u make ur orders... then on .. i think february 18/19th .. you go down to their HQ and collect it... quite zzzzz

oh well.. we then made our way to our seats... which actually weren't that good though it cost 200... it was the furthest row on the ground level... non elevated.. so which means that if people in front stand up.. then the back rows all gone case... which was what actually happened during the concert. oh well... redeeming point was that we saw jay chou's mother and grandmother sitting just a few metres away from us...haha...

oh well... jay's concert was relatively good..and at one point... during one of his songs... he invited his grandmother to the stage to dance along with another dancer... which was quite a sweet and nice moment ~

quite a energy packed performance...and most people stood up through the whole performance at our ground level... many costume changes... many original lyrics and interesting stuff done by him... haha... really enjoyed it a lot. hopefully he'll again come sooner... as compared to last time... which was like 2 or 3 years ago...

and oh. getting back after the concert... without car. horrendous. by the time i get to mrt station.. no more mrt. then i took 197 which i chanced upon ( which i found miraculously goes thru geylang, bugis, north bridge, raffles city ) to go to jurong east... the bus was crowded... and to top off... i stood beside this guy/aneh who smelt of ... uri... nm.. smelt bad... i pity the person whom he sat beside later when there was a vacant seat...>.<"

reached jurong east... then walked to chinese garden mrt cause my sister who's supposed to fetch me from there doesnt know jurong east well... -_-"

shagged. my legs are aching... haha... and still going out again tomorrow... sing karaoke... the last day that i can enjoy before i go totally into my shell again to mug for the upcoming exams...

ah... kk... this's been a long post... after not posting for so long...

so goodnight everybody~ goodnight dear~

sweet dreams!

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

busy busy

ahh... really hectic period of the semester... exams coming in 2 weeks... now still got a few more assignment / projects to do...

one major one one just ended...statistics...zzz... just glad that it's finally over...

now there's lastly counselling presentation...

and finally left with the 500 word essay for psych for the 5 credit points... and the 1000 word report for counselling....

after all these it'll be the exams...

time just never seems to be on our side when it comes to school work... haha...

and a lot of other people also aren't enjoying the current situation...

oh well... i believe.. that we'll all preservere through it all... and have a good long break after the exams this time...

and to dear little fairy.. please do take care of yourself ar... i know you haven't been getting much rest lately....let us get through this hectic period together :D

and kk.. nuff talk.. back to studying...

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Spice and Wolf Opening Theme - Tabi no Tochuu

En Route on the Journey

All alone, I grew lost within the journey
Only my heart wandered and stood still
But now I can walk very far
That’s right, after I met you on this road

The travelers sing an unfamiliar song
I hear it nostalgically
If I’m just with you

If the world that I dreamed of exists somewhere
Then shall we go search for it? Across the wind
Let’s go see the end of the freezing daybreaks
Parched middays, and shivering dark nights

Monday, January 7, 2008

Faith - Lisa Komine

Believe in yourself
Be who you want to be...

I will shed no tear, I will face my fear all alone
All the doubts in mind, I will leave behind

Lost in the dark, seek for the light
I hold out my hand into the endless night

To get through the time in strife in my life
I tell myself over to never give in

Feel your heartbeat inside you
Don't be afraid
Keep the faith
That's the key to all the doors ahead
Open up your way with the brighter hopes for today
The sun will rise upon your way

Believe in yourself
You're not alone
Believe in your strength
You'll find your way

My weakness inside is something I can't hide from your eyes
So fragile and fair, so much i can bear

Breaking the chain that binds you from pain
Through gentle rain, you're free once again

Searching for truth and love in my life
'Till I find my own I will never give up

Listen to the voice of your heart
Deep in your soul
Keep the faith
Let it work a miracle in your life
Never look back on sorrow and let go of your pain
The light of love shines upon your way

Feel your heartbeat inside you
Don't be afraid
Keep the faith
That's the key to all the doors ahead
Open up your way with the brighter hopes for today
The sun will rise upon your way

Believe in yourself
You're not alone
Believe in your strength
You'll find your way

Sunday, January 6, 2008

sighz

haiz. i've got a bad feeling... that my house's gonna turn into a major screamfest once again...

peace is going to be a scarcity soon...

and i'm going to be the person caught in the middle once again.

sucks to be me sometimes.

Saturday, January 5, 2008

Muthu jokes ( Found this on a forum... )

*MUTHU & THE INTERVIEWER*
Interviewer : 'What is your birth date?'
Muthu : '13th October.'
Interviewer : 'Which year?'
Muthu : 'Every year.'


*MUTHU & HIS MANAGER*
The Manager asked Muthu at an interview....
'Can you spell a word that has more than 100 letters in it?'
Muthu replied: 'P-O-S-T-B-O-X.'




* MUTHU & LONDON TRIP*
After returning from a foreign trip, Muthu asked his wife, 'Do
I look like a foreigner?'
Wife: 'No! Why?'
Muthu : 'In London, a lady asked me, 'Are you a foreigner?'...
that's why.'
Wife : ?????????


*MUTHU & TOURIST*
A tourist from U.S.A. asked Muthu whether any great man was
born in his village... and Muthu said .. 'No sir, only babies were born
here.'


*MUTHU & HIS EXPERIMENT*
Muthu was doing an experiment with a cockroach. First he cut off one
leg and told it to 'WALK! WALK!' The cockroach walked.
Then he cut off it's second leg and told the same. The cockroach walked.
Then he cut off the third leg and did the same. Finally, he cut
off its fourth leg and ordered it walk! But the cockroach didn't walk. Suddenly,
Muthu said loudly, 'I found it. If we cut a cockroach's
four legs, it becomes deaf.'



*MUTHU & DRIVER*
When Muthu was travelling with his wife in a motorised tricycle,
the driver adjusted the mirror. Muthu shouted, 'You are
trying to see my wife, eh? Sit in the back. I will drive.'


*MUTHU GOES TO HOTEL*
Muthu went into a hotel. To wash his hands, he went to the washbasin.
Then when he had finished, he started washing the basin. Seeing
this, the manager asked what was he doing. Muthu pointed towards
the signboard '*WASH BASIN* '


*MUTHU & INTERVIEWER - FINAL PART*
Interviewer : 'Just imagine you're in the 20th floor of a building
and it's on fire. How will you escape?'
Muthu: 'It's simple.. I will just stop my imagination.'




*Oh... Last I forget ............. the funniest...*
At a political rally, Muthu was arrested. Why ????????????
Because a lady journalist with a badge which read
'*PRESS*' pinned on the right part of her blouse walked past him... and
he did it!

happy new year!!

happy new year everybody !! haha.. though this is really sort of belated... hahaha...

been a bit busy recently... especially over the new year...

2008 Resolutions

1) More exercise
2) Mug harder
3) Be more fillial
4) Most of all... to always be there for my little fairy...

this year's gonna be a totally new start...

kk the slacker side in me is screaming to be let out... before i totally shut him inside due to the upcoming exams... shall post whenever i feel like it...